Guru Purnima - A Reflection by Charlotte Moraga
Reflections on Guru Purnima by CDI Artistic Director, Charlotte Moraga
Tonight is the most beautiful moon, bright and full, radiating a silver light. It is not just any gorgeous full moon, it is Guru Purnima--a time when kathak dancers, or most students in the Indian classical tradition, honor and reflect on the guru. Guru can be many things to many people. My understanding comes through my experience with my Guruji, Pandit Chitresh Das, studying with him in the guru shisya parampara for nearly 25 years. This a complex, ever-changing and dynamic process through which one gains knowledge, skills, and some would even say enlightenment. It is knowledge that cannot be separated from the relationship and the process. Like the phases of the moon itself, the guru shisya parampara was ever changing. When I started my journey with my Guruji, everyone called him Dada (elder brother), because he did not feel right calling himself or allowing others to call him guru. He would say, “Guru gives blood.” And he did. His generosity of spirit, of knowledge, of encouragement was unparalleled. He gave it unflinchingly, but not unconditionally. If I had a private class with him and I didn’t practice he'd give my dakshina (class payment) back and tell me to go practice. But, if I reciprocated with 100% of my heart and soul, and efforts, he would give tirelessly. Looking at that process, which did not end the day he left this earth, as I continue to strive to carry forward all that our relationship produced in him and in me, and as I continue to evolve as a human being, a teacher and a dancer, I feel reluctant to call myself guru.
He would say, “Guru Shisya Parampara is a roller coaster ride.” Yes, It has its ups and downs, twists and turns, and all of human emotions along for the ride. It is through this journey that you develop knowledge of the art, yes, but more importantly self-knowledge and greater awareness of the human condition. He would say "You have to go beyond yourself to see yourself". Deep systematic study of kathak, and any profound tradition, takes you on a journey of self- knowledge and seeing the world in all its complexities through the lens of the universal truths and the nava rasa.
Today, I was working with Maahi, my student who is going to perform her Youth Company Graduating Showcase, the first step in a long journey of the traditional kathak solo. I realized just this week that this was the 24th student I have guided through this process, just in the way that my Guruji trained me and I watched him train others. Yet, the idea of calling myself a guru is still something I wrestle with. Am I being an individualist and not honoring the tradition I was bestowed and following in the tradition of working as a guru once my Guruji leaves this plane? Or is calling myself a guru assuming a role that I still have not yet achieved? Do I give blood? Blood carries with it oxygen and nutrients to make cells work, grow strong and thrive. Whatever name that is attached to who I am and what I do, I will never stop showing up to teach this tradition that he taught me with so much love, fire, and all the nava rasa, but ultimately with the most profound commitment to give it all. He would say, “Pray for me, that I can dance at the age of 70 with Jason” (a tap dance phenom half his age). We did. And he did. And then 2 months later he was gone, and unknowingly, my role changed overnight. I think I am content to say, “Pray for me, that I can say at the age of 70, I gave my all. I gave blood.”
Charlotte Moraga studied intensively under Pandit Chitresh Das from 1992 to his passing in 2015 and tie ganda with him in 2002 and was also a soloist in his company, as well as having choreographed some of his seminal works, “Sita Haran”, “Shabd”, “Pancha Jati”, and others. As Artistic Director of the Chitresh Das Institute, she has been a prolific choreographer and has trained many dancers and teachers through CDI’s Youth Company, Kathak Dance Fellowship, and Kathak Teacher programs. Click here to read her full bio.
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